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  • Sonia

Mommy Is Busy With Her Business.

Updated: May 3, 2022

Are you trying to have a Business, Start a blog , or just have more boundaries around what YOU want as a mother? Do you dream of more time for more things? Connecting to your highest purpose, and needs is a good way to do it. I suggest you sit down with a close friend and talk about what your purpose and dreams are. That close friend is YOU. Spend some time by yourself and connect to the essence of who you are. When I was discovering what I needed, I used exercise as my time to think - and it was the first boundary of time that I set with my family. I am a guilt free expert after a few years, and I'm proud of me for getting here. I had to say 'No' And "Wait until I am Finished" to my mother and children, but its worth it. Big Business here I come!

How do I do this? How do I connect to all the things I desire as a Mom, while carrying the mental load of it all? I felt guilty a lot at first , but you can see most of what I did on Instagram. I have to say that my way is not for everyone. I had to do some deep soul searching about how much I valued my needs , over caring for all the other things. I love my family - and I am not going to spend my time defending that statement - but they often come in between what want to do, and I usually give them what they want - and then I build resentment. Are your guilty of the same thing?

I spent so many years putting my 'half effort' into my business and self care. I was always prioritizing my children, and then partners needs. I was last on the list. I put a stop to that in 2020. After a few grounding experiences that let me know how important my feelings and needs are, I set out on my path of deep radical self care. I am so glad I did. SO! How did I do it?

I started to time my 'free time' and my 'work time' and my time spent caring for others. I was spending a great deal of time caring for my children, and partner.

I needed to express my creativity through arts, not just through my parenting and motherhood. I was lucky enough to meet a cool fiber friend who was in a similar situation as myself. We made a schedule with each other and a point of meeting virtually everyday to work on our business goals. We made ourselves a priority - So, we were making our businesses a priority as well. The thing is , once you get a taste of the success of completing business goals, or any goals for that matter - you won't stop. Its such a wonderful feeling. It also helps if you have a team of friends cheering you on.

One thing that was helpful, is that I thrive on scheduling. I have a busy life, and if I don't set boundaries with my time - I will not have any for myself, or my business. I started planning my days in 2 hour blocks. I would set tasks that were not flexible and tasks that were. Then, I would set a timer - and work. When my family would interrupt me - I would say in my head 'what if this was an office and I was working? Would they be respectful and wait? or still barge in with demands?!'

Of course they would be barging in. Its not them - It's Me! How am I going to handle it?

I started making sure that I had a rehearsed response for the children. "I'm Busy" just doesn't cut it - because I am always busy. I had to tell them that they could have time with me "After mommy finishes this work period, I will play with you for 20 mins." or whatever time you have. Then, you need to stick to it and be consistent. The children and adults in your life will be better off if you are happy and have accomplished these work goals for yourself. It is great when you can complete chores, playdates, or date night with your partner all while keeping a Boss schedule that suits you. I would use a simple egg timer to gauge how long my work period would be - and it worked well for my littlest Sir - and for my eldest Sir who needed the timer to keep grounded while he waited.

Once I got my children used to the idea that I was actually working and that it was considered important - things were smoother sailing. My partner was another story. I guess adults have a harder time with boundaries than children do.

The real challenge came when left my ex and moved cities to care for my mom. How the heck am I going to have time? Well. Just because I am single and mothering doesn't mean things have to stall in my Business. I had to get creative in how my time was being used. It was a huge challenge - But I am doing great now, and can pivot if necessary.

We all manage our schedules differently. You must have a schedule though. You should be able to visualize your day and find the freedom for business within it. You're worth it, and your business needs your attention. It comes down to time, and applying yourself to the work. You deserve success, and the joy of saying "I did that! That's my Business!"

I am happy to have completed this blog post and I have crossed one more business goal off my list for today. I had to use timers, and boundaries to get here - and its all worth it.

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